Friday, May 18, 2007

Oh Really

MSNBC:
ROMNEY BELIEVES IN NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND

Except, of course, if that child is a half Jew in which case...
ROMNEY BELIEVES IN LEAVE CHILD BEHIND!...

and then PRETENDS HE'S DEAD

because 5 BROTHERS IS MORE CATCHY THAN 5 BROTHERS AND ONE HALF BROTHER

and HE MADE ME SIGN A PIECE OF PAPER THAT FOR $475 A MONTH CHILD SUPPORT I WON'T "BUG HIM"

but FYI I SIGNED IT WHEN I WAS TWELVE AND A HALF AND IT"S NOT BINDING!

Thursday, May 10, 2007

What's missing here

Family portraits are really cute. So are the backstories.

This photo was taken at a rest stop in Glens Falls, New York.

The rest stop is about fifteen minutes from Lake George in the Adirondack Park. My Mom drove me up there from Troy New York where were living at the time with some ass who though he could fix cars but all he could do was drink beer and shit his pants on command. He claimed it was his best "money making talent" because it was going to get him on the Tonight Show.

I begged Dad to visit me on the way to their "family" trip to Ontario. Queen Bitch Ann said it was too far out of the way. She wanted to drive through Vermont because she wanted to buy some "real" maple syrup. I had to tell Dad I thought I might be gay just to get him to agree to meet me at the Glens Falls rest stop parking lot.

I was allowed to say hi to my "brothers" just long enough for Tagg/fag to brag that he was wearing an "all Lacoste outfit", steal my dog, Seamus, and to force me to take this "family" picture. After I took it, Tagg/fag said thanks for the photo and "here's a whole penny, for the half jew."


Well, douche bag, 20 years later I invested that penny and ended up flipping a house in Henderson County at a 28% profit. What have you done that Daddy didn't deliver right to your fat face!